The Grip of Grief
July 1, 2026
“Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.” ~ Arnold Schwarzenegger
“A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.” ~ Christopher Reeve
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As you may guess from the quotes harvested for this post, this month’s blog is dedicated to recognizing our strengths in times of need. We’ll look at some ways to draw from our inner wells of hope and resilience, and actions we can actually take to strengthen these pillars of well-being.
In the past our country (I write in the United States) has felt terrible pressures and divisions, and has treated marginalized populations recklessly and with great pain. We cannot bury these elements of our problematic past. We did drive indigenous populations from their homes, murder them in the process and appropriate their homelands. We also enslaved human beings to create wealth and power. We seized land from Mexico through war and bloodletting. These are facts. Not what we were taught in school, but facts all the same.
Currently, our administration is trying to erase the truth in every way that serves them. We are living in chaos, instability, and for many individuals, terror. This “my way or the highway” approach to governing is not democratic and is not supported by our constitution. The disruption and disassembling of our democracy is frightening, stress inducing and making the entire world wary of who we are and what we currently stand for.
Allies are falling away as we blindly stand by and allow the starvation of Gaza’s children. We have appropriated the lands of other countries by taking the reins of their governments. Add to this the starting an unwarranted war, marginalizing immigrants, murdering citizens in our streets, and creating an environment that is constantly in a state of flux based on the whims of its leader.
All of this is inducing stress for everyone, deep and lasting trauma for others. Living in a constant state of uproar damages everyone living here. Especially when it looks like the very foundations of the way our voices are to be heard is being attacked. The chaos is overwhelming and we question if there is anything anywhere that we can do to stop it.
I ran across a book entitled, “Active Hope, How to Face the Mess We’re in With Unexpected Resilience and Creative Power,” by Joanna Macy and Chris Johnstone. While I am not finished with it as of this writing, I am enthralled by its inclusiveness, ingenuity, and cultivation of hope. I have lifted a couple concepts from this book that I feel you could benefit from in real time. Also know that I have no vested interest or receive any benefit in any way for including them in this discussion. I do find their work helpful for humans and worthy of attention.
My first beloved finding was not the author’s copyrighted work from the aforementioned book and was here for as long as the Haudenosaunee Native Americans (also called the Iroquois Confederacy) have inhabited North America. Their existence on this continent is over 4,000 years. Certainly longer than the age of our growing nation. The principles that the Iroquois have followed for all these centuries were presented to the United Nations conference in Geneva, Switzerland in 1977 and continue to provide a guiding light to all. This is their creed, entitled “Basic Call to Consciousness.” Here is what they read to this illustrious group and to the world:
“The original instructions direct that we who walk about on the Earth are to express a great respect, an affection, and a gratitude toward all the spirits which create and support Life. We give a greeting and thanksgiving to the many supporters of our own lives – the corn, squash, the winds, the sun. When people cease to respect and express gratitude for these many things, then all life will be destroyed, and human life on this planet will come to an end.” ~ Akwesasne
What if we actually recognized this as a human race? What if we taught it in our schools, recognized the gift that is our life and our planet? I recognize that this is a way for humanity to unite, to understand who we are and how we must live to survive. Gratitude for what we have opens our eyes to the needs of other living things. It is a gift of healing.
Another element in this book of gifts is a spiral diagram that can be used individually to uplift spirits and engage in community. The diagram is a simple spiral with questions at points that move around the spiral starting with love and gratitude and ending with a question that asks what we’d like to do – one step to move us toward a future we would like for ourselves and loved ones. Take a couple minutes on each question. Here are the questions you can ask yourselves:
- I love…(identify what you love about life, your situation, yourself, community, etc).
- I’d like to thank…(gratitude for people, things, places, life elements, etc.)
- Looking at the future we’re headed into, what inspires me is… (roll with this!)
- Facing these concerns, what inspires me is… (this could be your work, the work or lives of others, how animals are surviving in the world, anything that moves you)
- Looking into the future we’re heading into, what I deeply hope for is… (lay out your hopes, your vision, your needs)
- A part I would like to play in support of this is…(this question moves you into thinking about action, whatever that may be, your little contribution to a life worth living and a world worth living in)
- A step I’ll take toward this in the next week is…(This gets you rolling out of apprehension into becoming active in the growth of hope for you and others).
The first two questions fall into a domain of gratitude. The next two questions allow us to see and honor the pain of the world. The last three questions identify our hopes and allow us to move into action to support the development and growth of what we see as a better future. Then as we begin the work, we revisit these questions along the way and the spiral repeats as it goes upward. Can your see why I love this technique? Try it alone, with your family, groups of friends, or in your community.
All of the well-being practices I have offered over the years can be found at https://asandyplace.com/blog/. All of them are effective in building the resilience we need at this time in our history. It is time to cultivate the inclusiveness we need. We must tell all of our truths to mend, heal and come together. We must unite to stop unnecessary wars, pain, starvation, death and destruction of our environment. We must act together before it is too late for both ourselves and all life on this planet. The clock ticks.
I appreciate all your comments and ideas. Contact me at sandy@asandyplace.com. Visit my website at https://asandyplace.com/.
Yours in well-being,
Sandra (Sandy) Place
